Goals For June.

Hey babes!

As you all know I use this blog as a little bit of diary, focusing on all areas of my life. Recently it dawned on me that sometimes this little blog can be a more doom and gloom than fruity and motivating. So, from now on in the midst of it all I want to share with you my goals for the month. 3 small things which not only lets you see a much more positive side of me but allows me to focus some energy on something a little more than finding the right pyjamas after a bit of a poor day.

No 1. Cook More.

If can’t cook won’t cook was a term for any one, it’s me. I tend to cock up even the easiest of readymade meals. Cooking doesn’t come naturally to me so this goal, fills me with dread. I’d love to cook a quick meal up for my family or friends and them not to politely tell me it takes of dish water.

So, this month I aim to at least try to cook more, maybe just start with the easy stuff. You can’t burn salad can you?

No 2. Find my Fragrance.

Up until now I’ve been using The Body Shop’s Vanilla chai as my day to day. As much as I still adore this body spray, I kind of want something that feels a little more, well, grown up. With spring and summer finally popping out and reminding us that winter doesn’t last forever, its my goal to find a SS18 Fragrance I love.

Best get looking!

No 3. Save.

Okay, a little boring but as I am sure my bank will agree a much needed goal. June is a pretty basic month for me and I really want to get my head down and Save. Winter is such a busy time for me so I love that summer is way more chilled.

Without the millions of birthday, Christmas celebrations and gift giving, it is much easier for me to save in the summer. I promise this is the only boring month out of the four!

No 4. Do something out of my comfort zone.

Now, I ain’t gonna be jumping out of any plans, fighting lions or touching frogs (ewww), but I would love to do something I would have never thought to before. Even something as simple as catching up with a blogger I’ve never met before. A cocktail master class, perhaps? I don’t know, but I’m sure as hell ready to find out what.

Just as theres no frogs involved. Deal?

And there you have it my four goals for June! How the flipping heck did it get to JUNE! Heres to a happy and productive month!

Always Love,

Em x

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A Few Things I am Loving This Month!

Hey loves.

As you know I really want to strip back my blog content. And what’s a better way to do that than a good old favorites post. I do have to admit that some of these favorites aren’t really ‘new’, I’ve loved them for a while and haven’t had the chance to chat about them.

This month’s picks are stuff that I use/watch daily. I really do love them all!

Lanolips

Not going to lie, I love a nude lipstick. One of my current favorites is Make Up Rev’s Chauffer, but with a love of lippy my lips can often become really dry and dehydrated. After watching a Lydia Millen vlog i decided enough was enough and went on a mission to find Lanolips- I say mission, I just went to Boots.

Opting for the Rhubarb tinted lip balm, due to a, the smell and b, it has a slight tint that gives my naturally pale lips a boost they need. I am not going to lie this doesn’t come with a cheap price range- for a lip balm at least. At £8.99 it is on the pricey side compared to some, but it works like a dream!

I’ve had this for about a month and use it quite often, especially on those no makeup days. The product last for a surprisingly long time, but when I come to think of it does anyone use a lip balm to the end? Anyway, I digress.

Essentially, the price point may be on the high side of things but the quality of the longevity and of quality are worth it. I don’t think I could go back to another cheap lip balm.

Zara Broiderie Top

In a nutshell, this is me in a top. Cute, ever so girly and just a bit neutral. I love it. This Zara buy (my first tbh) has fast become one of my favorite items I own! Broiderie is having a huge reinvention this year and I am living for it!

Being a bargain at £25.99, the cost per ware alone is minimal. The oversized top disguises any food babies or areas of concern but also makes you feel beautiful – not frumpy. If I were to advise anyone to buy anything it’s this bloody top. It’s simply beautiful!

Primark, Grey mules

Has to be said that these mules are looking a little worse for wear nowadays, but that’s because I have barely had them off my feet. The dove grey babies are so comfortable and look amazing with jeans, I do wish they went a little more with my work wardrobe, but we can’t have everything our way can we?

At a bargain price of £10 I am hoping and praying that Primark have introduced a blush and a black pair, because this girl needs ‘em!

Jasper Conran Bag

Okay, this bag was the best money I have spent. I tend to use this bag for work because Its huge and I can literally throw most things in there and go! The bag itself is so light but study. After months of pretty much every day wear this bucket bag has still kept it structure beautifully.

If I am 100% honest with you, this is the purchase that opened the flood gates and let me finally give into my love of clothing and finding my own style. I tend to find it funny that this handy £50 buy is still something I reach for daily, it makes me smile and generally compliments most outfits. And honestly, I am all about that.

Atypical.

I’ve been meaning to watch this Netflix series for a while now and after a rave review from a friend I knew it was a must. After finishing off a pretty heavy TV series (The Alienist), Atypical was just the heartwarming series I needed in my life.

It follows a young lad, on the autistic spectrum trying to figure out his way around young love, sex and anything else thrown his way. The story is brilliant and it really shows a great insight into the lives of those living with Autism.

Definitely a must watch.

& Iced Americanos.

When the suns out I switch my normal warm cup of coffee to an iced one and this year, I am living for an Iced Americano! I tend to have this bad boy black but if I fancy it I do tend to add a little bit of soy milk. Haven’t quite mastered it at home, so this is my perfect summer pick me up when I’m out and about.

And Va La, that is months ‘ Few thing I’ve loved this Months’ post. Hope you enjoyed! If there’s any content you’d like me to write let me know in the comments below!

Always love,

Em x

Being Miserable, Finding focus & Finally Putting Things In Motion

 

Hello peeps,

So if you’ve read the past few blog posts and thought, ‘jesh, this is a bit generic for you’, you’d be right. Don’t get me wrong enjoyed writing my past(and a few more posts to come) couple of post but to an extent they didn’t feel like I had written them.

Being miserable.

Okay folks, I’ve been miserable for the past few months. I couldn’t get out of my head space and for those around me I’ve been bloody hard work. Shit friend and all that.

Now, I am by no means going to go into why or how I was so miserable, but what I will say is that I hate that version of myself. I’m blunt, grouchy and just seem to suck the life out of the room. After something horrid happened in my life, I decided only I could change the place I was in. So I wrote myself 3 goals for the next two years, in hopes it would kick me up the arse and honestly, so far its worked.

Finding Focus.

Those three things (which I promise to tell you as soon as I feel like the wheels are rolling) really are things that would benefit not only my life but my mental health, too. Over the past month, I’ve had a few panic attacks and honestly I am petrified of being in the same state I was a year ago.

Finding positive experiences such as meditation, walks and even a very small amount of Yoga, has allowed me to relax and channel some of the energy I have wasted worrying on the insignificant things in my life into something much more meaningful. Now I am by no means going to preach the benefits of meditation and Yoga but simply to say they’ve turned this stress head into slightly less of one. Bonus.

Apparently Saggitarius’s are known for losing focus half way through a task and honestly, that couldn’t be more apt of my personality. Drifting from job to job and never really finishing them, is a specialty of mine. Currently I am so focused for at least completing one of these life affirming(okay that might be a bit much) tasks, that I’m making the most of it.

Well, for as long as it lasts anyway.

Getting the wheels in motion…

Maybe a little adventurous, maybe this bit should be called finding my keys in the bottom of my bag?

But I have at least started the process of two of the three things I want to change in my life. Even though I am nowhere near close to completing either of them the fact I’ve started has made me feel a little less glum. These baby steps may be small but they are most definitely in the right direction and as of right now I am so excited to see how far I can go with them.

 

Promise to keep you update.

Em x

New In… Beauty.

Now I wouldn’t call myself beauty babe by any stretch of the imagination. My full face of makeup slides off and becomes all sorts of red by 10am. I may be a total novice when it comes to application but I really enjoy a good beauty find. I LOVE opening a new package of something beauty and having a good ol’ play.

In this little list there is definitely a varying list but I am so excited to try them all! When it comes to hair care, skin care and most definitely make up, I may not be the best but I will definitely fall in love with them even if they are all types of wring.

Nyx lip line in Peel.

I love this peachy nude lip liner!

Recently Beth Sandland has been quoted in saying your best ‘nude’ lip is the color of your nips. This may be a little TMI but Peel is almost on point when it comes to this- well they do say sharing’s caring. Maybe a little more on the orange side of things but I have to say I kind of agree with Beth, its definitely much more flattering than the tones I would usually go for!

Now, let’s stop talking about my nips, aye?

The pencil itself is quite hard-which I actually prefer. However, one of the issues I have with not only this lip liner, but many others on the highstreets, is that you spend more time sharpening the pencils than using them. There’s so much waste! Saying that I use this lip liner pretty much every, with the price of £3.50 I can’t help but say that I am pretty impressed with it, waste and all.

Nyx Dewy finish Setting Spray.

Okay, now I am not one for setting sprays. And from the little knowledge I have of them this one isn’t the mothership. Saying that this is highly affordable and its okay for everyday use. I wouldn’t necessarily suggest others to buy this but I’ll probably use this until the end.

On first application it leaves your skin beautiful and definitely shoes a ‘glow from within’ rather than ‘sweaty beast’. As the day goes on and the product wear it almost removes your make up. I’m often left with patches of bare skin by the end of the day.

For a few hours this product is amazing for a full day in a warm office it’s a bit of a no, no.

L’Oréal Botanicals Shampoo and Conditioner.

Not going to lie, this was a complete bloggers find. Lydia Millen has recently credited her locks with this range so when I saw they were on offer in boots I knew I had to at least try them. Opting for the gernrianm oil shampoo and conditioner due to its repairing qualities, and being specifically designed for colored hair.

I do have to give a special mention that this smells bloody beautiful! Picture yourself in a field of flowers and you’ve pretty much got it.

I have only used this product for about a week so I can’t really give too much of a review, but so far I like it. My hair definitely feels less ‘clogged up’ – if that’s a thing. On a daily basis I tend to use a lot of products, dry shampoo, hair spray etc, so often my hair feels a little crunchy to touch. This shampoo and conditioner combo does really seem to make my hair feel clean.

Colab Dry Shampoo.

I am currently a woman on a mission. I want to find a dry shampoo which doesn’t cost me an arm and a leg but works with my oily scalp- Looking at you Bumble and Bumble. Obviously I have used batiste before and its pretty good I just feel a little off about it.

So when I saw colab on offer in my local boots i decided to give it a go. Like the new L’Oreal and conditioner I kind of think it’s a little too soon to try but so far its okay. It’s slightly finer than Batiste and the smell is pretty pleasant- and I adore this packaging.

Right now, I am not so sure this is what I’m looking for but so far its okay.

Nyx Highlighter in Snow Rose.

Okay, I’m guessing you’ve all realized I dropped a pretty penny in Nyx, but this has to be my best buy yet. I never understood peoples love of highlight, always seemed to think that they made me look like the tin man instead of adding a natural hew. Until I picked up this one.

This iridescent bad boy kind of looks a little scary. Color highlights always do but this pink sheen is honestly a god send. Adding a swish of this on your cheek bones just gives your cheeks a pop, and the formula is so light you don’t even notice it on your skin.

I do use this every day, normally blending it into my blush so I don’t look like a shiny smartie. Personally, I find this highlight just finishes off the look. I can’t describe why I love this product too much, because I don’t know.

 

A Cosy Friday Night In.

 

Recently things haven’t been all peonies and butterflies if you know what I mean. So I’ve been opting for cosy nights in to keep me somewhat sane. Friday nights, in my opinion, should be the one night a week we destress. After the no doubt pants week where we pretend to laugh at jokes that aren’t funny and probably do jobs that aren’t ours.

Obviously, my Fridays are no exception to the rule. Fridays, should be filled with all my favorite thing. Comfort.

Candles.

Like most millennials, I like a candle. There’s nothing more relaxing than being curled up with a good book, under many layers of blankets reading a book with your favorite scent filling the room. I would go further and say it’s downright therapeutic.

Right now, I’ve kind of fallen in love with Denelm’s own, £1, Vanilla candle. Its sweet enough to just let the smell linger in the room without being completely over powering. Some vanilla scents can give me a headache because there just a little too bold. But not this one, not this amazing bargain candle.

As a rule I do opt for vanilla, as boring as it seems to some the sweet aroma provides me with so much comfort. Perfect for a snuggly night in.

Fresh bedding

Let’s, be honest with ourselves. Nothing beats fresh bedding after a shitty day. Changing your bedding no matter your day really is something to look forward too.

Personally I love my sheets to be super snuggly and opt for a brushed cotton where ever I can. Primark are brilliant when it comes to snuggly affordable brush cotton sheets. I think a bottom sheet only costs a £3.50. Bargain!

Films.

If you’ve read one of my previous blogs you will know I am obsessed with films. I don’t have a particular genre, I reach for more often than others, I love them all. Sitting with a cup of tea cough*bottle of wine*cough* and watching a film is such a great way to spend a Friday night.

Perfect way to welcome the weekend? With a hangover, from all the tea.

Face Mask.

I don’t think anyone will truly understand my love of a sheet mask. They’re easy, they work and honestly I miss them when I don’t have them in my life. What’s more is that there are so many affordable sheet masks on the market. From boots own to soap and glory you really are spoilt for choice.

Sheet masks for me are a little bit like candles, in the sense that you don’t really need them but when you have them in your life you feel so much better. I have quite dry skin, so sheet masks really do give the nourishment my skin lacks. This little luxury is such a god send when it comes to a cosy night in AND they work wonders for your skin. Hello, glow from within.

Carbs, carbs for Days.

Now picture this, you’re all snuggled in bed, your favorite scent filling the room AND garlic bread. Dream come true, amma right?

On a serious note, carbs provide comfort. Sometimes a salad just won’t do and I am a firm believer that Friday nights are a night for carbs.

Cosy nights in are a must. Maybe it comes with age but gone are the days of jaeger bombs and clubs with sticky floors. Right now, all I want is my cosy nights in for one.

What about you? Do you love a cosy night in or are we completely opposite?

May’s Monthly Round Up.

Hello you lovely bunch,

Over the next few blog posts I want to strip it back and for back to my roots. Sharing with you my favourite things, what I’m up to and a few other tid bits. I’ve had a pretty poor time with my mental health and I really want to focus on more positive things. I hope you understand.

May has been a little bit of a whirl wind, with two Bank holidays, the Sun finding its way out of the clouds and the many a sun burnt Brit, it’s safe to say for most it’s been a good one. As much as my panic attacks have come back with a vengeance I think it has for me too. I’ve finally been able to sit and work out what I want and focus a lot of time and energy into figuring out how to get it.

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Leeds

In Sundays post I shared with you my slightly boring antics from a overnight stay in Leeds. I wont rabbit on about it again but I loved it. It was a perfect relaxed getaway. Definitely what the doctor ordered.

Infinity War

Again, I mentioned this is a blog post recently but I couldn’t pass up a time to write about it. I’m pretty much mind blown about the who thing! Marvel and the Russo Brothers are the best combination since bread and butter.

You have no idea how hard it is not to give away a spoiler or two…

New goals

From the 1st June I’ll be sharing with you my monthly goals. Naturally, I am the type of person who loves to focus her energy into bettering herself, but sometimes it gets all too much. So from now I am taking my mammoth to do list and chopping it into little pieces and tackling them each month.

Some of the goals are little mundane things like, finding a foundation that doesn’t split or finally getting my hands on some fake tan because I am slowly turning a shade of white milk would be jealous off. Others may be the heavier things in life, like finding out what an ISA is or looking into furthering my education. I think* that’s what you call balance.

Changing my Mindset.

As I’ve said in this post (and a few more posts to come) I’ve really been a bit of a Debbie downer recently. I could list the many reasons as to why but honest, I’ve let life drag me down and I hope that i can only get better from here.

May has been the month of realizing things can stay as is and if I want to have a different lifestyle then only I can change it. Focusing on more positive areas of my life means I am not only able to lead a happier life but be a positive person for people to be around.

And that’s always a bonus.

& The lil’ Blog Changes

I don’t think that many of you will notice the changes, or maybe you will. I’m stripping back my think pieces and focusing my time on more positive influences in my life. Sharing the things I love and focusing on the things that excite me rather than things that don’t.

I also, am trying to swear less in my blogs but if the odd fuck is thrown around, so be it.

And there you have it. May’s Monthly round up. It isn’t as exciting as I thought it may be, but this is something I wanted to share as in 6 months’ time I won’t be feeling like this: in six months’ time I can look back and realize that May 2018 was the month of realizing stuff.

What’s happening with you ? Has may been good to you? Or are you reaching for a bottle of wine and motivation like I am?

Always Love,

Em x

24 Hours in Leeds…

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Hey guys!

Recently I went on a little trip away with my mum. And I can tell you that it was very much needed(still is if I am 100% truthful). I think I can safely say that both mum and I enjoyed every minute. There were many giggles, lots bought and many G&T’s drank- maybe the last bit was only my experience.

Leeds will always have a special place in my heart- it was the first city I ever really fell in love with. The museum, to cocktails, the shops, there’s just something I love. So when we booked this 24hour get away I couldn’t wait to show my mum all the places I loved.

Opting for the train, (due to the fact I like a gin and its only a half an hour journey) we left the station at 8.27am and set of for a much needed night away.

The Hotel

A quick 10 minute walk from the station, Crowne Plaza, is brilliant. On outside looks, it does look like an office block, but as you walk through the turnstile doors it is really beautiful. With marble floorings, a grand stair case and a hipster bar, the hotel does hold something for most.

The wonderful hotel was made even better by the staff. They simply couldn’t do enough for us. We initially went to the hotel leave our bags and then run off to spend the next few hours shopping until our feet couldn’t walk any more. But the lovely lady(unfortunately I didn’t get her name) found us a room and we could check in early! She was so informative and welcoming it was the perfect start!

Opting for a twin room we initially thought the room would be quite small- which we were completely fine with. We were completely wrong. The rooms were spacious and the ‘twin’ beds were pretty much doubles! Hello star fish. The room was clean, warm and for a business hotel, are I say it, quite cheque. The grey interior made the room feel so cosy. There wasn’t much of a view but honestly what do you expect from a city hotel?

The bath room is pretty bog standard, a porcelain toilet, small bath and a massive sink. What I wasn’t counting on way the epic lighting and huge mirror! Its safe to say this hotel made both mum and I feel amazing, I will definitely go back!

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Saturday

After falling in love with the hotels, we decided it was best to venture out. So of course, we made our way to the Trinity shopping Centre. After deciding to start at the top ‘ and work our way around’- such a mum saying, we started went into a few stores before settling down for a coffee. I should note at this point we’d done some damage in Primark and I was starting to swear after every foot step- damn my what were once ‘comfy heels’.

After refueling we decided it might be time for lunch, so we headed to our go to place, giraffe. Both mum and I love the menu, there’s something for each of our tastes. Pide for mum and a burger for me all washed down with an Aperol Spritz, which surprisingly my mother who is notorious for hating all things prosecco. LOVED.

The rest of the afternoon resulted in a few Porn Star Martini at the Prince Albert, because I’m all about that 241 life. And a massive sweet/crisps/ carbs raid of M&S. Don’t we know how to live.

After a quick nap and a good amount of rummaging around the room- doesn’t everyone do that? We decided to venture down for a drink in the hotel bar. I do have to note that the drinks prices (even for a city) were high, my poor mother nearly had a heart attack at the price tag. Nonetheless, it was such a lovely way to spend the evening.

And what did we do after ? In true rambles style we went upstairs and ate our body weight in Colin the Caterpillars and fell into a carb coma.

And I have to note: that I had one of the best night’s sleep, ever that night.

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Due to the fact we didn’t have to check out until 12, we had a little lie in. At around 9 (yes that’s a lie in for us early birds) we took a sleepy walk to the hotel restaurant and the buffet breakfast. We then discussed how much we loved the hotel and even gave a nod to coming back. After finishing up with our fry ups (who needs fruit and vitamins at a buffet breakfast anyway), we ventured back up the room to pack and put together a plan of action.

Deciding the 10 am was an acceptable time for a G&T, we strolled along with our bags in tow to the Slug and Lettice. This chain constantly surprises me. Sometimes the bar is horrifically busy and the staff are so rude it completely puts me off. Yet, at times like this where the staff were happily pootling along, I love it.

I will just put it out there that The Slug has had a bit of a Insta face lift. So if you can check out this branch, then I’d definitely recommend, even if it’s just for the beautiful millennial pink booths!

After a few drinks and the Trinity finally opening we went back to Primark and did some Damage. A couple of pairs of shoes, new pajamas and whatever else we could get our excited little hands on later we (I) decided we needed some carbs.IMG_4769

Crepe Affiliare it was! And it didn’t disappoint. Choosing a Nutella Pancake with Strawberries with and accompanying Nutella milkshake(Nutella is life) was the best way to finish of the weekend and honestly I don’t think I would have had it another way.

I’m really sorry for the lengthy AF blog post, but I just wanted to share with you my stay. I had such a wonderful, relaxing time I didn’t want to forget it. I often tend to buzz through life and don’t tend to sit and realize how important nights with your closest’ s truly is. It’s safe to say if you made it to the end of this post without a snooze somewhere in the middle you did well.

Hi five!

Always love!

Em x

 

5 Things That Make Me Happy.

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Hello my loves,

I want to introduce more happiness into my blog. Recently I’ve been a bit of a misery guts, but that’s for another time and a lot of Gin. I couldn’t think of a better way of doing that than sharing the things that have and still continue to make me happy. I hope you enjoy this very simple post, because I loved writing it. So, here are my 5 things that make me happy.

No 1. The first sip of coffee in the morning.

The first sip of coffee in the morning is the elixir of life isn’t it? Or is it just me that instantly feels their body go ‘Ahhh’ after the first warm drop of coffee hits their lips? Coffee for me personally, is something I go to for any occasion but that first sip in a morning is just something else.

Can’t promise delightful little brain farts like this won’t follow.

No 2. Meditation.

Sorry to disappoint I am not the stereotypical hippie many associate with meditation. Although, right now, after emotional rants to the girls, it’s the only thing that’s keeping my sane. At the moment I am using meditation as a way to take twenty minutes a day to relax. With life being a little stressful, its all too easy to forget that both your mind and body need to rest. Meditation, for me, does that.

Often I find myself meditating before bed as a way to try and turn my brain off so I can, well, sleep.  And if I’m honest, it works. Without meditation right now, I would be a lot more of a mess.

No 3. Reading.

Okay, I don’t do this enough but I love to snuggle up in bed and read a few chapters of a millennial, Bridget Jones style book. My most recent reads will be coming up in a blog post shortly. Never the less, getting lost in a story filled with drama, sex and a lot of wine is something I love and have to do more often.

No 4. Infinity War.

No, I haven’t gotten over it. I don’t think I ever will. Spiderman [heartbroken emoji].

Films are something I adore and Hun’s, Marvel constantly knock them out of the ball park. I recently went to see the midnight showing of The Avenger’s: Infinity war. And whilst I do have many, many, many questions about the film, I can’t wait for the fourth ‘un-named’ film to come out.

No 5. The girls.

I never really understand why we call our bunch of female friend girls, we’re 25+, we’re women. But I’ll go with it.

My girls are my life line. They never judge, they understand my flaws (I say understand there has been many a sarcastic comment thrown my way) and champion any ridiculous Ideas I have. I love them.

Oh, I give you guys all the cheese!

There you have it, the 5 things that I have been making my smile daily.

Pst: Yes, this post was totally inspired by the babe that is Kate La Vie!

Always Love,

Em x

To the women, who don’t know…

F7DA3C81-7F32-44C5-880E-F3F04F864F43Women, arguably the better sex (let’s face it we are), we empower each other, sometimes without even knowing it. From the caring drunk girls at the club, to the empowered CEO who owns the boardroom, or the mummies who give their lives to the next generation, women are pretty incredible. As much as I am aware that men thrive in all areas too, I personally find something amazing about the undeniable tenacity As much as I am aware that men thrive in all areas too, I personally find something amazing about the undeniable tenacity of females. Sorry, but really not, sorry of females. Sorry, but really not, sorry.

This post isn’t about feminism, this is a post aimed to share the women who make me, me. Who make me strive to be better, who make me want to focus my heart on soul into a career. Basically, this is a nod to the women who indirectly make me feel empowered but will never know it.

*Sam the Accountant.

First up, let’s call her *Sam the accountant. Sam* rocks all outfits with a fuck this shit attitude. Whenever she walks in a room people know she’s there. From her, oh I just woke up like this tousled hair to the, can walk for miles in six inch heels kind of look. She not only owns her look but she commands a room.

And what does Sam* make me want to be you ask? Confident. Sam may not be confident all the time- none of us ever are, but she has confidence in her own abilities. Doubting yourself aides fuck all nothing, it limits your self-worth, tames your talent and creates havoc on your ambition. If I am ever to learn anything from Sam* I hope it’s to own your talents and wear them with pride. You go Sam.

Tory*, the nail tech.

Now this one is a little strange- a little like Tory*. Tory* is currently in her own word having a Spiritual crisis. With her emotions telling her one thing and she body telling her another. Does she let anything stop her? No. Day dreaming her way through life, one achievement at a time, she surpasses even her own expectations- not that she would ever stop to see that.

What have I learnt from Tory*? Day dreaming shouldn’t be sniffed at, it should be embraced. By nature both Tory* and I are day dreamers. We are often told to get our heads out of the clouds and into something productive. Yet, what if one day our day dreams become a reality? What if the day dreams which help is get through the day, are in fact out brains trying to remind us, of our goals, form becoming a writer to becoming a family?

Keep day dreaming Tory*.

Sophie, the mommy.

Okay, so Sophie, kind of one of my besties but here’s the thing. We live over 400 miles apart. Sophie does anything she can for her little one. She struggles daily with chronic pain which sometimes can leave her more than a little anxious. Does that stop her from being a mum? NO. Does that stop her from running her own business? No. DOES IT STOP HER FROM BEING MY AGONY AUNT AFTER I’VE FUCKED UP FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME? Nah, she laughs and reminds me I’m a hufflepuff.

And what have I learned from soph*? Love.

{Inserts break for vomiting.}

Soph showed me that no matter what you are going through, no matter the reason, the people who love you will always give you a reason to strive to be better. Sometimes the empowerment you need is at the end of a hug, and I love you or even a bottle of tequila. Soph* is an amazing mum that worries about her abilities, she need to never do that. Soph* you are truly amazing.

 

*People who I have mentioned throughout this blog posts names have been changed, to protect them and myself from any embarrassment in the future.

Women are often type casted as bitches, as people who will tear someone down when there are unhappy themselves. Yet, all too often its other women that push us (yes, shocker I am female, too) to continue to be better. To build a world of positives rather than negative. It might just be me, but I wanted to share a little nod to the women who may not know it, but have a huge impact in my life.

Thank you, your boss ass babes.

Always love,

Em x

Single-rella: Lessons I learned from my Ex.

Hey guys,

I wanted to introduce this little series. Single-rella is a way I can share with you my tales, brain farts and plans for an independent life. In the past I have learned some stonking lessons and can’t help but think that others may need a helping hand like I do. Thus single-rella was born. I’m not sure when this post will come about, but I am sure that’s some of the topics, I am going to talk about will ring home to a few of you.

PSA: I know this could be one of the worst blog titles in existence, but it’s all I’ve got so I’m running with it.

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Now, let’s get on with it.

Moving forward, the dream aye. Leaving all your issues from past relationships, well, in the past. Naughty pics, late night ‘hey stranger’ texts and those disgusting little habits we pick up when we act like we’re in a relationship without the ‘EXCLUSIVE’ banner. When the excitement of the relationship(let’s call it that) dulls and the relationship reaches it ultimate end, we tend to tell ourselves we need to get over it and quick.

As time goes one we ultimately let go of the shitty relationships we have gone through but sometimes we have to have a little peek into our past to fully value the direction were going in. You all know I love cliché; sometimes we need to look back to see how far we’ve come.

*Vomit*

Society tell us constantly, constantly we need to continuously move forward, that looking back isn’t an option. When maybe looking back and realizing the ways our lives have changed is a must. A way that means we learn from our own lessons and continue to build a life we one dreamed we could have.

Relationships are a prime example. Reverting back to relationships is something we all have and probably will do again, if we are all honest. That one ex, we loved when the world was falling down around us, that no matter how bad life was treating us- no matter how bad they were treating us, we go back too.

Psychologically, I think we hold onto something so much that the people who surrounded us at that time become a crutch. No matter the circumstances of the ending of the relationship or the relationship itself for that matter, we constantly go back.

Is it a bad thing?

Of course, to some extent it’s a bad thing, But have you ever looked at an ex and thought why was I so besotted with you? Asking that question without any hate shows that you have moved on, and although another relationship isn’t on the cards you have let go of the whole situation. And if you are asking the dear old question with hate, then you’re not over them. Sorry to be the barer of blatantly obvious news.

Do I regret my ex? Sometimes, yes. Do I regret knowing what I want from a relationship because of said ex? No.

As I sit and write this I am so proud that I can now look back with the future I am creating and know that my life has changed. And will continue to change due to the lessons I learned in that relationship.

And what did I learn you ask?

Well. HERE GOES.

  • I will never stand by and let someone I am in love with compare me to other women. I am me and they are them. If said person thinks that other women are for more dateable than I then said fella can jump on the bus back home.
  • I will never be made to feel about my size, big or small. My ex often indirectly made me feel conscious about my weight. From the start, there were often comment which in hindsight he probably didn’t realize was an issue. AND HUNS ITS A NO FROM ME!
  • Sexting is cheating. That is all.
  • Follow my gut instinct. Now, following my gut instinct should have been rule one. If something feels a little iffy then it generally is.
  • I am all for equality, women should pay for their half of everything, but when It comes to paying for everything it’s a massive fucking no, no. And the same goes if I was a male. A relationship should be equal.
  • Please, be you. No matter what happens throughout the relationship if you feel like you’ve changed or something in the relationship is damaging your mental health, LEAVE. There will be other relationships that will come into your life but there is only one you.

 

What I’ll keep with me.

Obvs, not all of my relationship was bad but the times I learned the most from definitely wasn’t great. Essentially what I’ll keep with me is I need to know who I am and what I stand for before moving into another relationship. A year has passed, my anxiety attacks have significantly diminished and I most definitely have a little more confidence than what I had this time last year. Right now, for me that’s enough.

Yet, often I tend to look back and miss the person I was, I want to tell that shell of a girl that in a years’ time, after the shit storm that’s coming your way, you’ll know a little more of who you are and what you want. Single life isn’t all that bad, it’s time to be selfish and build the life you always wanted. An independent one.

OH, and you’re so much happier for it.

It doesn’t matter if your relationship was 3 months or 30 years, sometimes you will always associate yourself with someone. Whether the relationship has ended on good or bad or even the shitty ‘mutual’(which is never fucking mutual) terms, there’s that one person we will always have that one person we go back to when we’re a little lost. On one occasion though, you’ll know that’s it, that person is no longer your person but you can move forward with life knowing the shit that you went through, or even the shit you put them through, wasn’t right.

Move forward, love, and be happy.

We all deserve it.

Always love,

Em x